The following piece is an excerpt from my book, “Word, From Your Mother,” a daily guidance journal written for my children, Liv and Pierce-Gabriel.
What is our true essence? Many of my teachers identify it as consciousness or awareness. I don’t think we can conceptualize or label it, though. It doesn’t have a name or a word that would accurately describe it. I believe that I’ve experienced the feeling associated with it, though.
I guess, to put it into the written word, I’ll call it true essence. It’s not a tangible thing. We often label who we are: mom, daughter, son, artist, teacher, but that’s not who we indeed are. Those are just labels that we use. It is separate from our true essence. In his book, Source Code Meditation, Dr. Michael Cotton calls the externalization of our identity as the “object.” He gave the example that if you look at a cloud, you know you are not the cloud, or if you look at people around you, you are not those people. If you look at your “self,” you are not even that. In other words, your true essence is formless. The formless you should not be confused with the spirit or the soul. You are neither of those since you can be the onlooker of both.
How do we experience our true essence? There are so many ways, but I find that you allow the beautiful feelings associated with inner connectedness during the quiet moments. These are the moments when you are still and free of thought or concepts. My teachers say that once you transcend the self to the essence of self, there is no need to conceptualize, label, react, or feel fear because you become one with what is. Some people identify this as enlightenment. I know that the feelings associated with this stillness in being are that of profound peace.
Some people may never achieve this connectedness in their lives. They are too busy focusing on anything and everything that genuinely doesn’t matter (which is just about everything). Usually, there’s a hyper-focus on having things, comparing self to others, involving themselves in drama, and a myriad of other life scenarios. It is my only desire not to seek but feel my way into true essence. I know in my heart of hearts that this is the way, the truth, and the life.
Let’s not leave out the “I Am” part. The “I Am” part is the true essence. That which cannot be labeled only pointed to that dark space, that void, and emptiness. You may think that using the descriptors, “dark space, void, emptiness,” has a negative connotation, but they do not. Source Energy (God) created the world ex nihilo, “out of nothing.” Break the word nothing apart into “no-thing” or something non-descript. When you close your eyes to meditate, try to think of no-thing. Try to enter into the emptiness, the dark space, the void. Tap into your heart to receive whatever messages may arise. Feel the connectedness. Most importantly, share this connection with others on the material plane not by story telling but by the expressing compassion and love.